First off, if you do disagree with me, you are probably "normal", so don't feel the need to tell me how normal you are. I already know. And just so you know, I love normal people. But I don't feel the need to connect with my normal friends at the moment.
Calling all abnormal friends!! Please come to the surface, please. I'm feeling lonely.
O.K. now that you are all here--all 12 of you-- thanks for joining me today.
So, what is my rant?
I'm trying to get my head around this enough to focus my thoughts, but this is the gist of what it is:
Why do perfectly normal Christian people allow or even encourage dating amongst their own children or other young people?
The reason I am asking is because: I don't get it.
I realize that the age at which young people are ready for relationship stage varies from kid to kid, but it seems that the kids who are the least prepared for life (no prospect of employment, no real goals, no real direction) are also the most likely to be involved with a teen relationship.
My question is for the parents of these aimless young people: What is the goal for your child in this casual dating experience? Are you hoping this experience will prepare them for marriage? Will it deepen their relationship with the Lord? Is it developing or stunting their emotional growth? Is it helping or hurting them with their educational or professional goals? Are they developing socially as an adult? Is this aiding or distracting from living a holy life?
I can not even see one benefit from casual teen dating. Nor, would I take it lightly if I sensed my kids wanted to be involved in any relationship with the opposite sex. I would take it seriously and soberly, praying with them for guidance and direction from the Lord.
We are not legalistic style parents. We have not set a magical "age" for dating/ courtship. I just expect them to behave like adults when the time comes.
For our sons, I would ask them this question: how do you plan to support a wife? If they are so far from financially supporting someone (let's say at age 16..) then, why would you want to get involved with someone when marriage is so far off?
For our daughter also. Is this young man going to support you?
Obviously, financial constraints are not the only questions, but they do put the issue in perspective for a 16 or 18 year old. I suppose there are a few industrious lads out there who could pull off marriage at a young age. But let's just think about these things.
It's not to say that young people may not have an "inkling" of who they would like to marry at a young age; I think that is entirely possible. But the "couple status" at a young age is probably not in the best interest of most..