Sheltered

You know how I hardly ever have any high brow thoughts anymore? It takes a high-brow blogger like Mrs. P of Titus 2 to inspire me to think about stuff.  She's good for me like that.  So, the question she is pondering on her blog has to do with sheltering our children.  Do we shelter? and from what? and to what degree? and is it overall beneficial?  (or something along those lines)  Various people are chiming in.

It reminded me of a conversation that my oldest son had with us, right before he left for college.

"WHY did you shelter me?  Sheltering is bad."  (or something like this)

Will and I just looked at him with one eyebrow raised.  It was never our goal to shelter our children.  If we had written down one of those grandiose mission statements for our family, there would not have been a sheltering column.

No.  Sheltering was never on the radar.  So, were we loosey goosey about parenting, then?  No, not at all.

As written in such a way that I am speaking to my own children..


But it went something like this.  We wanted to provide you with an excellent education.  Homeschooling was a part of achieving this goal.  The fact that I could not drum up a bunch of rowdy infidel type of children to join us in our homeschool is secondary.  It certainly made my life easier trying to teach you because I didn't have to compete with the system of rowdy infidels.  Therefore, by default, you were sheltered from them.

Here's another goal.  We wanted you to have useful, productive lives that are the byproduct of hard work.    Is it possible that a hardworking, productive family has little to no television in their lives? A constant viewing of useless things is not helping us achieve our goals for you.  Therefore, by default, you were sheltered from media nonsense.  

Health nutrition and active lifestyles are also part of our goals for you.   People are happy when they are healthy.  Healthy involves intentional eating.  It means I force you to play outside (even now) and drag your butts off the couch to enjoy the good old fashioned fresh air.  Can I help that I've sheltered you from being overweight, unhealthy and sedentary?  Can I help it that everyone says our children are the "picture of health"??  whatever that means.  I means I'm the food nazi and no one (including daddy) can just eat whatever he wants.  It means a lot of our income goes on food.  And that is on purpose.

Excellence in academics and goal achieving.  Yes, I have "forced" you to be in things that you would rather not do-- public speaking clubs, strings instruments, drama, and anything else that you didn't like but we made you do-- is all about sheltering you from a useless, aimless life.  I know too many adults who still haven't figured out what they want to do when they "grow up".  In our family, you set goals and you achieve them. end of discussion.  It won't seem unusual for you to be doing that when you are adults because you've been doing it all of your life.

About God.  You had no choice except to born into this family.  In our family, we love Jesus.  Because we love the Lord Jesus, you have been (by default) sheltered from a variety of things. (notice that I didn't say we are Christians.  I said we love Jesus.  There is a difference.  They were called Christians because of their love.  There are plenty of people who say they are Christians.  What their lives have to do with Christ, I do not know)

So here are a few things you were sheltered from (by default, because we love Jesus and are trying to live for him and obey his Word)...

a. A broken home: It should be the norm not the exception that people who love Jesus choose to stay happily married.  Thankfully, both mom and dad love the Lord Jesus and by his grace are still happily married.

b. a home with fighting and shouting: We are not perfect, as you know.  But we are trying to love the Lord Jesus so much that he helps us manage our disagreements.

c. a home of substance abuse: people who carry the burdens of this life are very prone to alcohol and drug abuses.  I think it would be impossible without Christ, so no wonder people have addictions.  In Christ, even the things that are hard to do are possible--like managing problems without addictive substances.

d. a home without love: Even people who claim to love Jesus often have a coldness in their hearts toward each other.  You know we are not perfect and sin often, but we have love here.  Maybe you've never thought about it.  Something tells me that when you go into someone's home who is without love, you'll recognize the difference.

And I'd like to think that God "shelters" me in the same way.  He often doesn't come right out and let me see all that he's protected me from.  Through his gentle leading, he is providing a path of blessing AND protection.  What a good God he is!!

Organized? Whaaaaaaaaa?

Why is the title "Organized" even in my blog header?  I am the biggest hypocrite that ever walked the earth if I think I can give anyone organizing advice at this stage of my life.  I've even contemplated changing the entire header to something sublime like "The Hedgehog speaks" or even more eloquent, "the disorganized hedgehog speaks.."

I have friends who have probably read my blog, followed my advice and are currently threatening to clean up my house..  that's how bad it is around here.  And I'm half ready to let them do it, but now I'm on the other side of the coin saying, "but do I think I'll need THAT some day??"

Yes. Yes, I am REaLLY saying that.  Give me a hole to crawl into already.

Transition.  I'm holding on to a previous stage of my life (emotionally) and finding it hard to move on, so what do I do?  I hold on to the stuff that represents the time that I can't quite let go of yet.  In the meantime, everyone else is happily moving on.

Do I have to move on?  really?  No.  I could just sit in a cluttery disorganized house for the rest of my life, relishing the good 'ole days, whatever that is-whenever that was--and be so confused in my own clutter that I can't even find my car keys.  Sounds palatable, doesn't it?  yeah. but no.

So, what is the worst case scenario?

Let's see.. the worst case scenario is something like this.  I get rid of something that I actually AM going to need and have to buy it again.  And the real question is this: did I miss the will of God by getting rid of it?  Is he going to provide the money to buy something that I should have not gotten rid of, but did, and now I don't have it?

And the answer is this: yes, he is a good provider.  We have the freedom in Christ to get rid of things, even if we can in our remotest subcranial reasoning can fathom a potential situation that may include that item again.  If in our reasonable thinking, nothing in the foreseeable future is going to require that item, I think, we can, in all good conscience, dispose of it.

But what if I am too emotionally attached to the cuisenaire rods?  (the ones that I envisioned my kids learning math on and loving every minute it, but in reality, they only used them as toys and learned math with actual numbers...???)

So, for the things I am just too emotional to part with (at the moment), I need an emotional resting place for these things to simmer for a while.  When I realize that I value the clean space more than the clutter, I will joyfully get rid of the items--regardless of how many memories are attached to them.

This is why everybody needs to do a bi-annual overhaul--even disorganized hedgehogs.  There's something special about getting life organized.

I don't write because I am already organized (especially not these days).  No, I write because I am an A.D.H.D. Hedgehog who happens to "spin it" in a different light than the others.  And when I get to heaven, this all will be so clear and I'll have a blog about organizing, but it will be purely for fun because everybody will already be organized.   

How to flirt for the socially inept

You all know that I work with teenagers and young people, so this should be no surprise to anyone that I am expert "flirt watcher" and have the pulse on all of my kids, as well as all of yours.  We tend to call it "mom-coptering", and it is serious business.

Now, let's just get one thing straight.  Flirting is not just for the extroverts.  There are plenty of socially introverted people who make pretty good flirters.  But it takes on a new form.

And I am going to be "such a mom" and expose the world to a real life situation.

"Did you notice how close this girl was sitting to you in class?"  (me-- to one of my kids)

"Yes, I knew you would figure that out that she liked me.."

"So, it's true??  She likes you?  How do you know?" (me-heartrate pulsing, hot flash starting)

"Last week.  She just kept looking at me from across the room.. for the whole hour"

"So, do YOU like HER? "  (having a complete mother meltdown..)

"No.  But I knew that you would notice that she likes me.."

"Just because she is flirting?"  (hoping that my son has his head on his shoulders..)

"Is THAT really flirting?  Looking at someone and sitting next to them?  "

"Yes, for people without social skills,  THAT is flirting"

"Mom, I think you should write a book: Flirting for the socially inept"...

So, yes, I am writing about how to flirt for the socially inept.  If you have no words to say, you can always stare a guy down, sit by him, sit close to him while you are sitting next to him, hope that somehow your "accidental" gestures will cross with his enough to touch him and Voila! a relationship has blossomed!

Here are some other things that don't involve social skills: texting, facebook comments, and generally stalking them either by following them around or just hanging out where they are hanging out.  You can try dressing immodestly or showing a little cleavage.  It all helps.  In fact, you don't even need to be a Christian to get a young Christian man distracted.

See?  No wonder parents of teenagers go grey, take blood pressure meds, have midlife meltdowns, and need to go on cruises once in a while.  Aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhh.....

Boys, if SHE is hitting on YOU, think twice.  What does this say about HER character?

The senior takes senior pics..

Our senior in high school is officially the "photographer of choice" for her friends' senior portraits.  I have to admit the price is right.. and the quality is awesome.  She is just beginning a journey of photographic studies which began by studying free tips from the experts in internet articles.  Then it blossomed into her purchasing her first SLR Canon Ti Rebel.  Before you know it, she was heading to Portland, OR for the Institute in Photographic Studies, Prizewinning Photography 1 and 2.  And our next adventure is applying to the Institute of Art in Schaumburg, IL for  digital photography.  The Art Institute offers a four year degree in three years.  She has sent in her application, and we are eagerly waiting for her acceptance, Lord willing.

This is Joanna's friend, Casey.  To see the rest of them, go over to Jo-with-it's portfolio to see Casey's pics! They turned out great!

celebrating every new thing..

So, my six year old Emily was on the phone with her grandma..

"Grandma, you know what I like?"

"What is that, Emily?"

"lowercase g's!  Don't you just love lowercase g's, grandma?  I mean.. they are so cool.  They have this circle and the little tail that comes down below the line.."

"Yes, Emily.  I have always loved lowercase g's.  Are you studying them right now?"

"No.  I was just thinking about them.."
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And all the verbal-linguistics just giggled with glee, didn't you?  Yes, I do believe we have a linguist on our hands.

I have this sort of weird dejavu happening right now.

When Jamie was a little tyke, he was just sitting in the hammock at our home in Panama.  And he said,
"You know, I was just thinking.  Five and five together makes ten."

"That's right, Jamie.  How did you figure that out?"

"I was just sitting here thinking about it, and I figured it out.."

And a mere 16 years later, he is studying math and science  in college.

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I wish I had specific learning awakening moments for each one of my children, but I don't.  I can say this though.  The bud shows itself long before the bloom appears.  And each bloom is different and beautiful.  This year, the bud is really starting to take form in our Emily.  I have never seen anyone quite so eager for learning.  And.. I am so pleased with her new school and teacher that I am bursting at the seams with excitement.

Not every child or every season is the same in this life.  But I am so thankful for the Lord's provision for right now.  She does a full day of learning, and she still has plenty of energy for "homework" with mommy and daddy when she gets home. At her insistence, she reads out loud to us and writes on the board from the moment she gets home from school until it is time to go to bed.  (And that is after a full school day!) So, we still trying to catch our breath here, but my mother tells me crazy stories about myself when I was that age.

Apparently, I had this great big chalkboard and played "teacher" and "school" all the time when I was home from school.  I ran around the house, pushing a shopping cart, wearing every hat I owned on my head at the same time and would frequently be awake to watch Johnny Carson at night with my Dad and grandma.  I called myself "Theresa Jane" and gave pretend names to everyone in my "school".

Life goes full circle, you know.  And now that I am middled aged.. now you give me my clone, eh Lord?  I raised four "little Willys" and now I get the first "little me"..  No wonder I'm on the phone with my mother every day! !!!!!

Funniest thing said to me this week..

Yesterday I was having a full-scale meltdown.  And if I can be brutally blunt, I'm not one of those people who thinks she needs to hide in a corner somewhere in order to have a meltdown.  Wherever I happen to be at the moment, wherever it hits, that seems to be a good enough place for me.
Someone told me that her father said that you should not show your emotions in public and always be strong.  "I guess I missed that lecture" I told my friend.  Like who cares?  And my friends are used to me.

When I finally get two minutes to sit and think (generally at prayer meeting) seems like a perfectly good time to have the meltdown.  And no one died.  No one hates me.  I had a disappointment that derailed my emotions.  Actually, it felt good to cry, you know?

All of my other emotional friends decided to have their meltdown with me.  But we were bonding in our misery, and that felt good.  It was one of those sacred moments where you could almost feel the invisible estrogen circle forming.  The men were on the other side of the room, doing what they do best-- looking and feeling helpless.  But they're cute that way, so we'll keep 'em.

So, we had our big hugs and composed ourselves enough to start the next meeting.  Soon enough, the midnight meal activities are ensuing and there are kids and food everywhere.  Back to chaos and fun.  So, one of the mothers of the teenagers was there (but who didn't join the estrogen circle) asked, "What can I do to help?"

And I said, "Can you be my friend?"

To which she replied, "I was hoping for something easier.."

Yes, sweetie.  It is NOT EASY to be the organizingmommy's friend.  The hedgehog who tries to do too much in too little time with few resources and has nothing to give back to her friends these days..  Meltdowns are everywhere.  Life is volatile.  High maintenance friend alert!  Everybody run!

There's an entire support group out there called "Jena's friends", and their job is not easy.

And if you want an easy job... try organizing your shoes or something.  But please, please only be my friend if you want a really hard job!  LOL!

Exhale......

So, I know you'll ALL be disappointed, grieved, and despondent to find out that I will no longer be teaching preschool art.  I know. I know.  horrible.  I just had a really hard time making the transition on Tuesdays from teaching Language Arts to 7-12th graders and study skills with ACT prep and then immediately plunging into graham crackers and finger painting.  So thank you, Michelle  (mama at Hallstrom)  for taking it over.

I'm going on faith that someday I'll be an awesome grandma and do art with my own grandkids.  But today....  I am very relieved!!!

So, I suppose you are all wondering how Emily and I are doing at our vintage school?  Let me tell you, Wally, it is swell to the max.  I just got done helping Emily on her Victory Drill Book, copyright 1970. Actually, it is so straightforward.  Do you remember the days when we didn't have to include entertainment with learning?  Sometimes I think the youngsters today are so overstimulated that a good dose of Times Roman 14 textbook is exactly what they need.  And here's a thought: a reading textbook for six year olds with no pictures, except for a few token ones at the beginning to make sure you can find your phonetic bearing.

And how is Barbara Billingsley handling her Language Arts classes?  Well, Barbara is handling things much better than Ward.  Ward, the poor chap, asked very sweetly for some clean white T-shirts for tomorrow.  Thankfully, I have an emergency stash (I kid you not) of T-shirts, underwear and socks in unopened packages for just such a mid-week emergency.

Today, Barbara decided that she is going to let her students decide how to decorate the classroom.  Some talked of an aquarium with strobe lights.  I'd like to hear all of their ideas before I come to some conclusion.  As for now, I've managed to remove the broken clock, the vintage poster of a past president, the third grade looking poster that says "Let's Learn" and other random nit-noids.

So, I'm having a blast.  Teaching is coming back to me, and I like it.  And the kids are on the planet.  I'm not sure what planet, but it's the planet that I'm currently on, so that's all that matters, eh?

I'm a stay-at-home mommy

"What do you do?"

"I'm a stay-at-home mom. "  

Except..... when I'm doing other stuff that takes me out of the home.  The other stuff like: teaching pilates, wire management (professional organizing contract), English teaching at a Christian school,  Study Skills and Preschool Art teacher at the homeschool co-op, and blogging are just some of  my "hobbies".  

So, today, I am laying aside all of my hobbies and focusing on my real job--being a wife, a mother, and a homemaker.  And it feels good.  

Thank you, Lord for my "real job"!  

They might even call me an organizing mommy by the end of the day!!  Woooohoooooooooo..

You'll be happy to know..

* You'll be happy to know that the poppy seed I've been faithfully carrying around all day between my incisor and eye tooth on the left side is finally dislodged.  It was a really awesome thing to have that big black blop there all day--not quite as special as a tongue piercing or something--but special nonetheless.

* You'll also be happy to know that God's will has been revealed.

Emily came bounding up the steps this weekend and jumped into my room and said, "I know God's will!"

"Good! Can you reveal it to me, then?"

"No! Mommy!  I sounded it out.  I sounded out G-o-d's w-i-l-l"


* After her first full day of school, Emily was sitting on the bed lining up all of her carebears and playing some sort of game with them.
        "Did your carebears miss you today, Emily?"
"No Mommy! Carebears do not talk.  They are stuffed animals!"

"Oh, thanks for being such a pragmatist."   I so dumb.  When did she stop playing make believe?
I think she is officially done with being the perpetual three-year-old that we all think she is.  She was relieved when they did "real school" in class like reading and writing.  Enough games already.

Are you sensing an ENTJ?  yeah.  me too.  No thanks to her mother.  I was an ENTJ for years and lately I've been coming out more like an ESFP. I need to order the real test rather than just take the free Myers-Briggs that they have online.

Speaking of ENTJ, I gave all of my Hallstrom study skills students AND the Regents Language Arts students the learning style indicator (Myers-Briggs) and multiple intelligence tests to start off the year.  Some of the kids really got into it.  It really helps me to get to know the students and custom-fit the curricula to their needs.

But I will say this.  I am tired.  It's a huge waveshock not only going back to school but going back with the house sort of half finished, new (last minute) responsibilities, and just everything all at once.  I'm not overwhelmed, but I need to keep close tabs on my walk with the Lord.  If you think of us, pray for us.

:)

Is this even legal???

Yesterday after the church meetings, I was trying to strong-arm one of my friends into coming over for lunch.  Yes, I really do have to strong-arm people into coming over.  Sometimes they are too busy.  Sometimes they don't like spontaneous hospitality.  Sometimes they don't like beans and rice or whatever.

But usually I can get somebody to come over.  So, I have to start early with my "campaigning".  And then my friend, Becky, pulls a fast one on me.  She asks me to go OUT to lunch with HER.  What's that about?  Is that even legal?  You wouldn't believe what happened next. My family went home and made lunch without me... AND we didn't have any guests over. I feel guilty even typing this.

But it is true.  I told my daughter what to make for lunch.  No guests came over (primarily because some of the regulars were out of town..) and nobody died even.

So, I got to see what the rest of the world does on Sunday afternoons.  Interesting.  People eat in restaurants on Sundays.  Did you know that?  I think I saw many Christians in the restaurant we were in--some of them were dressed up and praying together before the meal.

It's not that it's BAD to eat in a restaurant on Sundays, but why would you want to? Don't you guys think it's so fun to have a bunch of people over for lunch? or any meal for that matter? I was just reading in the book of Acts how people broke bread and ate together.. like.. all the time.  No wonder people were added to their numbers.  It was a blast!

So, I was thankful for the special time with my friend.   Thanks for the lunch, Beck.  It was fun to see what the world does on Sundays.  But I'll be booking a table in my favorite restaurant (home) for next week.  

O.K. this vid will make your whole weekend.  I am going to be the lady in the green outfit someday. Love you guys!!

The biggest question is..

So the biggest question everyone is asking me is this-- So, how's IT going?  And I wonder if they are talking about our big decision to send Emily to a school, or my decision to teach at the school.  No, that's not it at all.

Everyone wants to know how I am surviving without FACEBOOK????  I am here to tell you that there IS life after facebook.  Therapy has been going well.  Therapy involves living in the real life.

Actually, the truth is this.  I've been too busy to even miss it.  What I do enjoy, however, is that a few of you are actually reading AND commenting on my blog now.  That is special.

So, IT is going well.  And so are my new responsibilities.   I am very excited about my new "job" of teaching at this school.  The kids are cute, the teachers are awesome, and the situation is ideal.

I even have a "vintage" classroom!  Have you guys ever heard of this thing called "chalk" ??  It's really cool stuff.  It comes in yellow or white, and there's this big board behind me that is green.  They call it a chalkboard.  When I was six, my mother bought me my first chalkboard so I could play "teacher".  Well MOM, life has gone full circle.  I am playing teacher now.

I would really like to round out the vintage theme by installing a woodstove and giving each kid a slate.  EXCEPT... there are a bunch of computers in that room also.  Not sure how it is going to fit with my theme.  Help me out, ladies.  How would you design this classroom?

Oh, and there are uniforms!  I don't have to wear a uniform, but the kids do.

Darling, I know.  Can you just picture how CUTE Emily is going to look in this???  LOVE it.

So, all of these vintage looking kids in a vintage classroom.  Maybe the 1950's era?  Leave it to Beave, Wally.  I think I'll dress like Barbara Billingsley--A line flared skirt, button-down pocketed shirt (tucked in, of course), heels, pearls, the works.  Where to get some vintage stilettos at the last minute??? It's so swell, Wally.