Thursday, July 19, 2012

Is that guy... dead?

Yesterday afternoon, my Mom and I took three of our kids to the pool.  It was about 99 degrees, give or take a degree, but there was a windchill factor that made it feel like 97, just sayin.  Anyway, in this delightful 97 degree weather, Mom and I were at the pool, fighting for the tubes and noodles with little eight year olds who think they need them. hmmmph.

So there was this guy.

A sort of whale.

He was lying supine, belly up to the moon.  His big dome-shaped abdomen was the certain sprocket of his small appendages, which were not moving.  Half of him was in the water, the other half was out.  He was right at the part of the pool where zero and two inches of water meet.

Little children had to walk around him to get into the pool.  Large people just avoided that side of the entrance.  There was a lifeguard about three feet away from him.

So when it was time to leave, my Mom said, "Is that guy... dead?!"

I'm like, "Ma.. there's a lifeguard 36 inches from him.  Do you think he would notice?

Do you see the rotundra?  It is moving up and down.  That means he's breathing. "

Breathing= not dead.

So, after we left the not dead guy, we came home and got ready for prayer meeting.  My kids were rushing around trying to get themselves ready for their next adventure and somebody colors on Nathanael with a permanent marker.  His favorite shirt has big fat, dark blop on it.

I said, "I can do that.." and I procured the Isopropyl alcohol in a spray bottle and a mash of grated Fels Naptha soap and an old toothbrush and proceeded to get the stain out.

Now keep in mind that my mother is the one who always gets stains out.  She is the stainmaster queen. I usually sit back and say, "aaaaaaaahhhhhh" after her good work.

But TODAY, I felt like I had jumped through the hoops of womanhood because I got the stain out.

And I said very flippantly to my mother, "You can go in peace now because I can get out stains.." Which was meant to be a compliment, but she either didn't hear, didn't care or just thought.. "whatever" and got on to the next crisis.

So, my Mom is all tuckered out and does not attend prayer meeting with us--which is completely understandable, considering the crazy life we lead.  But at prayer meeting, two things happen.  Jason's Mom, Barbara, got into a car accident on the way.  (Jason is my age) and one of their friends died and had a heart attack at the age of 63.  Barbara's accident shook her up, but she is alive and recovering.

So, midway through the prayer meeting, the events of the day and the combination of what I said to my mother right before I left, started to wear on me.  The not dead guy, Jason's mother, the 63 year old heart attack, and the passing of the stainmaster torch all combined into one big anxiety snarl, and I had to rush home to my mother to see if she was O.K.

And there was my mother, very calmly reading her book, cooling off under the fan.  She had no idea what this could possibly be about.

"I just wanted to see if you were O.K."  I came  bursting into the door.

Emily and I hugged on to her for a long time.  Yup.  She's not dead either.

And just then.. in my illogical, emotional, simple mind...

all was right with the world.


Barefoot Hippie Girl said...

Very nice.=)

Nita Brainard said...

You carried me with you. So glad for a happy ending!

AnnCecelia said...

Very cool. Ann

Kathi said...

All I can say when I read your stuff is, "You know, Jena, I love you!!!" I'm glad your wonderful, blessed mother is still alive and well, and I'm sure she didn't mind your getting a little bit sentimental and mushy. We all die too soon, anyway!

Jena said...

Hey I actually "know" all of my commenters. That's pretty cool. Thanks so much. My mother said to be "I was so grateful for the big, long hug, but I had no idea what that was all about.." LOL. Life is too short not to say I love you and give hugs.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Oh Jena! I have no idea what the proper response to such a tale is, but I'm laughing in sympathy!

And you're right, it's always a good time for a hug and an I love you :D


Mrs. Santos said...

I can relate. Especially now, I can really relate. I want to comment on this post, but I don't know what to say except that I am nodding with a knowing smile. Thank you for this post. It has encouraged me.

Mrs. Parunak said...

Ah, this is your writing at its best. Funny and touching at the same time. I'm glad your mom is OK, and that you all had a good hug.