Monday, November 5, 2012

Let's just keep this secret..

Ha.  What could I possibly want to keep secret with me and the rest of the entire free world?

Well, I have to admit something.  As much as I love to go on and on about how great my dear husband is.. I have to tell you something.

He is not perfect.

Shock.

I know, eh?

I mean just yesterday I was looking at him before we left for chapel.

"You realize you have sort of a wing-thing going on with your hair?" (I'm eloquent like that)

"Well, you are going to have to put it down then because I've done what I can do.."

Now this is true.  Every so often those handsome greying hairs get all rumpled up on one side, and they just wing up.

"And.. it's time for the eyebrow trim and ear thing.."   (nothing like getting a full eval before leaving to go to a public place and no time to fix anything..)

Now if I were to step back and look at the big picture of what is going on here, I would have to admit a few things.

First off, when I get out of bed in the morning, almost every hair I own is standing on end.   Hence, the name "hedgehog" that my kids have given me.

My morning skin is not "lovely" either.  MaryKay is awesome, just sayin.

And yet, the only slightly negative thing I've ever heard my dear husband say about my physical appearance in the morning is one time he said,

"I think we're getting signals in from all the bands.."  after looking at the antenna sprout coming from my head.  (a true ham radio guy..)

To which I looked in the mirror and fell back on the bed from laughing so hard.

So, what's the other secret?  I'm not perfect either.  Not in physical appearance, but even worse in character.

Nope.  I don't think he loves me because of my physical beauty or my gracious character, but occasionally he convinces me otherwise..  And despite his handsome grey hair and godly example, that is not why I love him either.

So, then what is it?  What is it that keeps a couple together for 21 years or longer?  Very simply this.

A hand to hold.

That's right.  A simple hand to hold.

When I've screwed it up or need to be reminded of God's forgiveness, God uses the kindness of my life partner and offers me a hand.  He may not even know what to say anymore, and often I don't either.

Marriage isn't (always) about the romance, the child-bearing, the who-does-this-and that ordering of home life, the let's-look-cute-in-public appearances, or even the (ever emphasized) biblical roles.  As importance as all of these are, there is just one more thing.

A hand to hold.  Comfort. Trust. Caring. and Love.

When the body is too old for romance and the children and their children are gone, when we are too weak to take care of the home, and we no longer look cute, when we have no idea who is in charge anymore, can we still have this one thing?

A hand to hold.

Start holding hands again--lest we never do learn what the real lesson is.

photo credit

3 comments:

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Oh Jena, that's just lovely... hedgehog hair and all :D

Julie G

Mrs. Santos said...

Yes, I agreee. Just lovely.

Mrs. Parunak said...

This is so great!